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Excerpt
Sean:
I’m learning from you and want to ask that question, like, how did you make that swing? How did you jump from “where I am right now ” to being where you are?
Laura:
I hated who I had become, you know what I mean? When I looked in the mirror, I just saw grumpy dirtbag looking at me and I didn’t like her. I wasn’t proud of who I was being. That probably hurt the most. I remember leaving my first marriage and one of the major reasons why I wanted to end that marriage is because I didn’t like who I was being. I think a big part of why I wanted to retire is because I didn’t like who I was being. And I actually used to think that it was the company that made me that way. No. I made me that way. And also I believed a lot of the lies that society and culture told me for years about how I needed to be in a marriage and accompany, whatever.
So for me, I needed to figure out what all happy and successful people seem to have in common. I needed to figure that out. I needed to figure out, why is it that I’ve been to the retreats and I’ve gone to all these classes and I’ve done the Tony Robbins stuff, and I’ve done this lecture and this meditation and read that book. Why is it that I’ve done all these things and spent thousands and thousands of dollars in the pursuit of happiness, but I’m still an unhappy lump.
Why what went wrong? What did I do wrong? Turns out it wasn’t me. There was a lot of things that were actually missing. A lot of the personal development world exists based on one particular notion, which is:
You are broken. Buy my product. This will fix you.
And that upset me because part of the reason why I always loved doing things at my marketing company is because I wanted to do things with high integrity and stuff, things to people for the right reasons. And it’s like, Oh no. Don’t buy that magazine ad because the salesperson told you to. Buy the other one because I’m objective and I make money regardless of what you do.
High integrity has always been one of my major core values. I guess I just got like really frustrated and felt like I’d been lied to. And I thought it was, I actually thought it was the self-help world that lied to me. And that’s where I began my journey turns out it wasn’t the self-help world.
There’s a lot of amazing, amazing lessons out there. So many wonderful books and so many wonderful products and whatever. But if you take a look at so many of these different things, a lot of these now that I’ve written this book and done all this research, I can put a lot of those in the context of those are a really good step two. You need a really good step one, which is give yourself a solid foundation within your relationship with you. When you do that, you can take this course, that class, that meditation, this and that, it will mean more, it will land better. It will stick, and it will give you a much more permanent impression.
So back to your question, how do you do it? Figuring out where do I start? Right. That’s where I started. Okay. Well, here’s the information. Here’s where you start. Six habits is where you start. You read the book, you Oh wow. You do all the exercises they’re free. And then you begin your mastery journey. I’ve got a thing that can help you with that. Or you can do it on your own, but at the end of the day, It’s not called the six Epiphanes they’re the six habits. What is a habit? It’s something we do unconsciously and we do it automatically. This is like you get every day, get up every day, and brush your teeth. I do it every day without even, or, you know, you roll over in your sleep and you always cover up that one shoulder. It’s a habit, right? That’s what needs to be cultivated here is actual habitual behaviors that you no longer think about. That’s the trick. And that’s why that’s why it’s the foundational element.