The Influence of a Father

I brew coffee once in a while. First, I grind the beans, then I put it into the paper filter and turn the brewer on. I’m not really a coffee fanatic but what I realize is this process of brewing coffee is something that brings so much joy to my son who is just one year and 7 months old.

So I carry him around while doing all these things – I even let him press the ‘on’ button of the coffee grinder now. It just makes him so happy to see the machine working and smell the coffee. He even says ‘mmmm‘ as he brings the ground beans close and sneaks a whiff.

What I didn’t realize though is that he will actually drink the bitter coffee.

You see, each time that I brew coffee with him, I love seeing him excited and all but I never really gave him any – even if he tells me he wants to taste it. I knew he wouldn’t like it.

So this morning I actually let him try a tiny sip to finally let him know that it’s bitter and it’s not really going to be his type of drink.

I was wrong.

After a very small sip, he actually wanted more!

To which I said ‘no’ and put the coffee away. Then it dawned on me – at 1 year and 7 months my baby is copying everything I’m doing with utmost focus – all the way to drinking coffee!

I know I’m new to being a father and I’ve heard over and over again how sons would copy what a father is doing but it’s different experiencing it first-hand. I’ve seen my son fix his hair like I do, make facial expressions like I do, try to say things like I do – and even drink coffee like I do.

The real question I need to ask myself from hereon out is: “What am I going to teach my son?”

Because whether or not I teach him, he will learn things from what I do. Now I need to have a re-check in how I live my life as a person because I have someone who I am going to nurture and he is going to see me as who I am – at home where my defenses are down.

I need to re-check the:

• Music I listen to
• Shows and Movies I watch
• Way I treat my house-help
• Way I treat my teammates at work
• Way I spend my time at home
• Way I treat my wife
• Way I treat my stuff
• Time I give to books and activities that help me grow as a person
• Things I eat
• Things I drink
• Friends I keep

I realize that my influence to my son goes beyond the bitterness of coffee. I really am his role model. And I intend on becoming the best role model I can be.

“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” – Ephesians 6:4

The best way to bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord is to model it with your life.

“…So the next generation would know them, even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children.” – Psalm 76:8

Fatherhood goes beyond nurturing your children. According to God’s Word, who you are as a father and what you impart to your children lasts for generations.

As fathers, we have a huge role that has a lasting impact in our society – what are we doing to make our role count?

Remember: You are only as good as you are at home.