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The Inaccuracy of the Term ‘Finding the One’

the right oneAs young, single Christians, I believe we have all gone through this romantic idea of someday being able to ‘find the one’ and marry and live happily ever after. While the latter is a myth, the term ‘finding the one’ is simply not accurate – and perhaps there is some untruth in it. Let me clarify what I mean:

The term ‘finding the one’ connotes that you have a special someone who is especially made and kept by God for you. The fallacy here is that you can marry the wrong person. What if you did marry the wrong person who is supposed to be somebody else’s ‘right one’ ? Because of what you did, then everything goes into a domino effect – and mostly everyone ends up marrying the wrong person.

This is an absurd idea.

I’m not one to say whether this is how things work or not. That is for God to keep – and reveal when the time comes. All I’m saying is: the idea of ‘finding the one’ can be true and false at the same time.

While it is true that there can be only ‘one’ person for you to marry, it is not true that you can marry the ‘wrong’ person.

If you are married, there’s news for you: as far as the Bible is concerned, you ARE married to your ‘one and only’.

But you know what really matters in all this? It’s that there is a matter of faith in all these. We are not sure of the romantic concept of finding our ‘one’ – who that person is, what his/her character is, when we’ll be able to meet him/her, and so on and so forth.

In romance, there are matters of faith – and in all this, God is in control. As far as the unexplainable mystery of God’s trinity goes, I believe the concept of ‘finding the one’ is something that we are never going to be able to explain. There is certainly parts of our life and history where the Lord has predestined things to happen. Then there are also those that are left for our free will to affect.

The fascinating thing about finding ‘the one’ is that we can affect it. Let’s face it, we are never going to be able to find ‘the one’ if all we do is coop ourselves up at home – never going out to meet and mingle and socialize. And if ever we do meet ‘the one’ will he/she reciprocate? Will he/she find us someone that he/she will spend the rest of his/her life with? There are what I will call ‘X-factors’ that is involved. These factors are ones that we can affect.

If you are serious about being able to marry ‘the one’ when he/she goes your way, make sure that whatever you can affect now, you will affect. You will improve. You will consider and work on.

Remember the term “do your best and God will do the rest?” perhaps this is one of those times where you can say – hey, that sounds about right.

These are just thoughts floating around right now. I don’t want to lose ’em. I’ll still have to rummage through these words and publish ’em in a simpler, more comprehensible fashion in God and You.

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